1 John 4:18
“There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment and he who fears has not been perfected in love.
“Perfect love casts out fear.” Pero natatakot ako. Natatakot ako na baka hindi magwork. Remember that time sa Philcoa? We were with Janine. Sabi nya, “Kung kayo, kayo talaga.” And I told her, “As if naman Christian na’to (ikaw) in two years.” Ayokong umasa sa evange-ligaw. Pero it’s always hard to choose, even when you know what’s right and what’s best for you; even when the only thing you’re holding on to is a 1/1000000 chance to make it work.
I’m not scared of the consequences. Di naman ako takot mawala sa ministry, kung sa’kin lang. Aanhin ko naman yung pagkanta sa harap ng mga tao diba? Pero kasi commitment ko yun kay God eh. I promised to use my talents for His glory, that’s why I can’t give it up. :(
I know it’s unfair of me to expect you to adjust. And i don’t want that. I mean, I honestly do not want you to engage in something you’re not genuinely interested in. I don’t want to force you into something that would make you compromise your beliefs. I respect you and the choices you make because they helped you become the “you” that I love.
And i really, really want us to last. I know you do, too.
Like i said in my 1st-month post, i love you and i regret nothing. I do not regret saying “yes” despite the complications i knew we’d encounter along the way. Thank you for sticking with me, for putting up with me through everything. :’) Alam kong nakakapagod na lahat ng ginagawa mo for me. Salamat sa effort. I really cannot thank you enough.
Wag ka mag-alala. Di ako nagpapaalam. And FYI, hindi totoong lagi akong ready kang i-let go. Mahal kita. Di ko kaya.
